Raising Friends

When we first found out we were having two girls, I immediately thought, They’ll be friends!! Even though my brother and I are close and Frank and his sisters are, too, there seems to be something about a same-sex sibling relationship. I’ve always envied people who had sisters – who had a built-in best friend growing up and into adulthood.

IMG_3935A friend and I were recently laughing at that ideal. She and her sister are close in age and are friends. But she said she wouldn’t consider them best friends. Another friend said that she and her sister, who are 9 years apart in age, are still quite close. I suppose it’s more of a personality thing than an age thing.

The past couple months have seemed like a turning point for Bea & Elle’s relationship. After the newborn phase, where Bea was disappointed in Elle’s lack of interaction, to the frustrated She’s messing up my stuff!!!! phase, we’re finally in (somewhat) of a playmate phase.

The two are inseparable. They’ll draw together, mother their dolls together, eat together, read together. Elle can’t wait until Bea is done with school and Bea rushes to her with a bear hug at the end of the morning.

I know we still have many years of fostering friendship with these two. But I hope that these moments are a true glimpse into the future. That, through the tween and teen years and into college and adulthood, they’ll continue to create and share food and perhaps even mother together.

What is your relationship with your sibling like? How do you foster friendship among your kids?

Linked with Kate Motaung’s Five Minute Friday, a time to write without editing. Today’s prompt is “Friend.”


Published by

Annie Rim

Welcome! I live in Colorado with my family and have taught in the classroom, at an art museum, and now in the playroom. I reflect about life, faith, and books here on my blog.

10 thoughts on “Raising Friends”

  1. It’s an interesting view, watching the friendships between our children. Ours, born 19 months apart, were good playmates. Seldom did we have to settle quarrels between them. My brother had the ability to drive me crazy at times. We are 4 years apart. Now, we often talk more than I do with our kids. I’m just grateful we all enjoy the company of each other. At least for a few days 😉

    1. My brother and I are 3 years apart, and I love having an adult friendship with him. I think Elle is going to totally miss Bea next year…. Sweet girls!

  2. Not having kids, I can only parenthetically add something about dog siblings.

    We have two Ridgeback sisters, Josie and Reebok (she of the white paws), and they have never been separated. Ever. They sleep cuddled together, and when they go for walks they’re either side by side or tumbling over one another in play.

    The harder aspect is that they’e a closed society, and have to be kept separate from the other dogs; they simply won’t admit any ‘strangers’. (They are super-friendly with people, I hasten to add.)

    Interesting dynamics. And a lot of fun.

    #1 at FMF this week.


    1. My biggest “regret” (not sure if that’s the right word…) is that we didn’t adopt Daisy’s brother when we rescued her. At the time, it seemed like too much work, but in hindsight I think she would have been a happier dog…

  3. That’s sweet that your girls have become such good friends. I always wanted a sister for that reason. It never happened but I have a brother and, while we definitely had our times of struggling to get on, especially growing up, I would say we are good friends now.

    1. My brother and I definitely fought growing up, but I do love having a brother. He taught me a lot about men and relating to them as friends. I guess there’s benefits to any sibling, right? 😉

  4. My sister and I are three years a part. We used to fight like cats and dogs when we were younger. But over the years we’ve gotten close. I’m in the 35 spot this week.

    1. I have a feeling we have some intense days ahead. 😉 But that’s an important part of life, too, right? Learning to disagree. I feel like fights with siblings are great ways to figure out the real world.

  5. I have an 4-year-older sister who, for a variety of reasons, has for as long as I can remember, held me (and my mom) at arm’s length. I’ve learned some things as an adult that explain her attitude at least in part, but it has always hurt. I wanted more for my own children, and you put into words so well exactly what I wanted. My son and daughter are 2 1/2 yrs apart in age and light-years apart in personality, interests, etc., but they’ve always been close (slightly less so since my son got married in November). It’s wonderful to see — such a blessing. Thank you for sharing. (a fellow 5 Minute Friday blogger)

    1. I think marriage changed my relationship with my brother. (He’s still single..) Not necessarily in a bad way, but just different. I’m always thankful for his perspective, even today, since we’re so different!

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