Making Space for Loss

Today I’m over at SheLoves Magazine, as they look at the theme of Pause this month. I had been remembering our miscarriage and how that loss has helped me reflect on and understand this time of waiting and hope in the darkness of Advent.

Here’s an excerpt – I hope you’ll click over to SheLoves to read the whole thing.

This season of Advent, in the darkness and candles, in the somber-yet-hopeful hymns, in the quiet anticipation of the Savior, it lends itself to deep breaths and exhales. We are remembering this season by waiting in anticipation for the Good News.

Several years have now passed since our miscarriage. As seasons and milestones are reached with our youngest, I remember that grief less and less. And yet, there are still moments that will always trigger that feeling. We drove to Yellowstone again this summer and on the way home, as I listened to my girls singing and laughing in the back of the car, I felt a twinge of remembering that long ride home.

I realized that grief isn’t over quickly, but takes time. Our emotions and our bodies need space to process and to react. I’m learning more and more that acknowledging grief is important to my relationships. When I grieve the loss of ideals or the loss of an opportunity, when grief encompasses how I interact with the world, I’m learning to give it time. To stop and allow this process to occur.

I suppose this is the importance of recognizing altars in our journey, to stop and mark places that change us. This is what has shifted the Christmas season most for me. It’s one of celebration and excitement, yes, but it has a layer of hesitancy as well—A time to stop and catch my breath. To pause and exhale. To remember that grief and joy are intermingled.

How do you recognize that this season is filled with hopeful joy mingled with loss and remembering? Go over to SheLoves to join the conversation!


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Annie Rim

Welcome! I live in Colorado with my family and have taught in the classroom, at an art museum, and now in the playroom. I reflect about life, faith, and books here on my blog.

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