I just finished reading Found by Micha Boyett. It’s her journey as a new mom in finding space for prayer, contemplation, and the spiritual practices she enjoyed before her time was consumed with an infant-turned-active-toddler. Among many other gems, she talks about resetting expectations – perhaps prayer is one line while nursing rather than a focused quiet time. She also talks about the rituals of motherhood and how the day’s routines aren’t that different from those who live a monastic life.
It got me thinking about routines I keep sacred. Some are spiritual and most others simply help my sanity, which I’m learning is a spiritual practice in itself. Before I had Bea, I had a pretty set routine. I’d make my lunch each night before bed and I’d be in bed no later than 9:00 to give myself time to read before I went to sleep. (I think it got pushed to 9:30 after I married Frank, but I was still very strict!) I’d wake up at 6:00 each morning and always left the house at the same time. As a single person and even when it was just two adults in our house, it was pretty easy to keep a set routine.
And then Bea came along. Just when I thought we’d found a rhythm to our days, her naps would change or she would be teething or daylight savings would occur or some other phenomenon would happen to throw our routine off. It took a while, but I learned to relax in the non-routine of it all. There are some things, though – even in the chaos – I held sacred.
1) I always make our bed. No matter if I napped with Bea again in just a few hours in those early days, knowing it was made at the start of each day made me feel like a whole person. Even now, having a made bed makes me feel ready for anything.
2) I always shower and put on “real” clothes. Staying in my pajamas all day makes me feel like I’m recovering from an illness. Early in my stay-at-home days, I made a decision not to wear yoga pants out of the house. I would change into jeans, run an errand, and often change back into my comfy pants. For whatever reason, going out feeling semi-put- together made even the longest days doable.
3) Frank is wonderful about letting me have a first cup of coffee while I read the news on my phone. It has looked different at different stages, but having that moment to ease into the day and catch up on the world helps my mindset, especially on days we have nothing much planned.
4) We (mostly) have family breakfasts. Even with the busyness of tax season, we try to sit down together in the morning. This has been vital, especially when Frank works late at night and misses bedtime. It’s one meal we can connect and focus as a family.
5) This is a new routine, but I’ve moved my Common Prayer book to my nightstand. I try to read three prayers a day, but am satisfied if I just read the morning and compline prayers. There’s something about getting that in that makes me feel less guilty if other study falls by the wayside.
What are some of your sacred routines?